Time to fly
Time to fly
This year on April 19th, I acknowledge my 7th year of living with another mans heart pumping inside my body. My first few years were quite extreme as I tried to recapture what I thought I had lost.
In the last few years it seems that I have become more or less apathetic in my struggle to retain my glory days.
I no longer feel the need to conquer my fears, or feel that I owe anybody anything. Yet, I do on both accounts.
Much like my TV hero Capt. James Tiberius Kirk, I feel I must die alone, for I took nothing into this world, and I leave it with nothing. Along the way, I know I have made bad people rich, and good people suffer. I know I have worshiped the green monster called money. I have sought to rectify the evil thinking that permeates our society. Yet, all is as it is. It will no change for, or because of me.
Having been reduced to a begging soul, not for a religious savior, but a world where I need not be afraid to die because I cannot afford this months live sustaining medicines. Is it because of the lack of medicine. No. It is because of the people of the United States who are afraid of their voice. Afraid of the bankers and pharma whores. Afraid of a psycho in the White house. Afraid of Police and courts who only want to punish and not provide means to a healthy life.
This is the source of my apathy.
I cannot, change the mind of a person that believes what the media spews. I cannot change the mind of a corrupt government official who believe that the party they belong to is always right.
The ignorance of the unchallenging are the meek that inherit the earth. Good luck with that.
Click thumbnails for larger image.
I don’t know if a woman gets this situation, but I am speaking from one guys side of what I think we feel and or otherwise ignore when it comes to being Friend Zoned.
First let us define friend zoned. As a guy, I think It means you had and interest in a sexual relationship with a woman/girl/whatever. However the relationshipee is not as accommodating as the relationshipor wants. They, unlike you, want to just be
You start out, usually inebriated, and some woman is in an amorous mood, and you stupidly think it is all about you.
It is not
It is them wanting to establish a relationship, but they don’t approach it in a logical manner, thus they either wind up with some scumbag that is going to do-em and dump-em. (if you are in the real friend zone, you will hear all about this.) Or, you will go off into a very predictable relationship advancement mode that I will explain later when I have analyzed thoroughly. In other words. Never.
So let us elucidate the structure of the friend zone:
It starts with a passionate kiss that sends your toes tingling. Then it is the quick grab, squeeze, feel under the table. No rejection there so you think you have a shot. THEN you buy her another two or three drinks. Mistake number one. If you pick her up at the bar, and she keeps wanting you to buy drinks…. you are not getting personal with her tonight. If you do, you will be disappointed. Trust me. However, this can also be a great chance to get to know her, but be careful because sometimes this can get very, very, very weird. Have your wingman ready to pull you off and shove you out the door. Many times I have been saved. Thank you Benton, Dean, Doug, Mark, Don, Norm…. It goes on.
This is surprisingly a very fluid moment. I hate to say it, but few go to the real relationship world. Most of the 2nd rounder’s are either the exile to the friend zone, or some very kick-ass-sex and never-want-to-talk-to-you-again developments.
If you have gotten this far it can mean many things.
You really like her and want to keep trying. (12% success rate.)
You think she is fun and by hanging wither her you will find other women. (success rate 42%)
Caution. This is a real test of the friend zone and if you find the woman who has declared you her man friend getting really negative to the woman you try to choose and explain to her, you should realize she has disrupted the force of the friend zone and you need to be either cautious or callus. I have used both techniques, and truthfully found that If I have been FZ’s I no longer really give a shit and find the callous approach has actually got me some anger lay’s so it is all in what you are looking for I guess.
Now if you have not taken her off Facebook, twitter and whatever, and have not removed her from your phone or blocked her calls, you still enjoy hanging around with and can have her pay for her drinks and introduce you to some decent chic’s.
NOW you are in the REAL FRIEND ZONE.
OMG ( did I just type that?), this is heaven for a guy. I cannot describe the feeling of having a sister you can get drunk and hit on, knowing nothing will happen and will push you off when you are all hands or actually introduce to her nymph friend and you smile about it, either way.
That IS the ultimate female friend. You are a guy so no matter what, you still want to have sex with them. However, when you start not thinking about sex with them, then you can actually develop a good give and take. I think there is nothing better than a true female “friend”, but it usually takes a lot longer than either side will allow.
A final thought
Every once in awhile a friend becomes an FWB. That is Friends With Benefits. You can call each other and setup a drink meet and maybe have a physical night together. No worries, no regrets. It is kind of rare but, it is why guys develop a harem of gals. Usually 2 or 3 that kind of shuffle in and out of their lives. It is actually a very stable relationship if all parties realize it IS about friendship.
There are a lot of advantages to this system, but ownership, childhood indoctrination and religious dominion keep these types of relationships at-bay.
So, you have been zoned. Accept it for what it is, but you need to start treating the person that zoned you as a buddy/pal/compadre, you will find most of the women cannot even handle that and it is adios… So be it.
This is a story made for contraction.
Occupation: Digital production and technical consulting.
To get laid. If in the process I find a woman that can do that, and still want to hang with… great.
Oh, come on what the hell did you expect me to say? I don’t lie about this shit. Oh wait, yea I do, but that is to the women. My sexual mores were formed in the late 70’s and 80’s when birth control was new, and AID’s were a half decade away. Free love, good weed (not really) and awesome in depth conversations. (ok really stupid Ideas) were our days.
My early 20’s were fun. I got to be a DJ and then got to travel all over the US working with people that lived in the towns that we would travel to and stay in. So dating was….Hi, you’re cute, I am from out of town. Do you want to come up to my motel and snort coke, smoke weed, drink and or fuck? Never kept stats, but I am sure the snorting coke got them up to the room better than the rest.
So here we are, a 22yr attempt at a lifetime marriage… I don’t consider it a loss, I consider it a……. tie.
to be continued.
April-June 2016 Journal American Apitherapy Society How a Bee Sting Saved my Life: Poison as Medicine By Christie Wilcox, 24 March 2015 Ellie Lobel was ready to die. Then she was attacked by bees. …
Source: Lyme Disease and Bees «
I like the way they handled this. It truly is a matter of freedom of speech limits. Police HAVE to be above reproach. If that requires paying them more, good. By becoming an official with a badge and a gun you have created a contract between yourself, and myself, a citizen, that you will treat me fairly and within the confines of the law. That contract is also clear that you behave publicly in a way that is not threatening, nor treasonous in speech or gesture. So, I think this officer figured that out, and is getting appropriate social guidance. -DTS
A San Jose police officer who controversially got his job back after he was fired for making violent Twitter threats against the Black Lives Matter movement has issued his first public apology nearly a year and a half after the notorious comments.